Loving Well – The Jesus-Way

2019-11-06 

Simon’s mother-in-law was in bed with a fever, and they told Jesus about her. So He went to her, took her hand and helped her up. The fever left her and she began to wait on them. Mark 1:30-31

It’s obvious that this little snippet in scripture shines the light on Jesus as The Healer. We see a practical example of how, when we let Him do His work in us, we are freed and given strength to turn around and serve others. But when it comes to loving others well, we can study His actions further, and learn from The Healer, who lived and loved: the Jesus-way.

I’ve been thinking a lot about how the Body of Christ must act in this dark world in order to bring glory to God…to shine as lights in the darkness…to be the hands and feet, ears and eyes, and mouth-piece for Christ. His way shows up again here, in this brief story. Jesus calls us to love each other so that by our love, the world will know we are His.

Showing God’s love in the world begins in-house. In the family. Loving and serving the Body of Christ.  It is only when this is in tip-top shape, that our love can go sincerely and authentically outward – into the world.

“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” John 13:34,35

We are surrounded by battle-weary Christians. Soul-tired believers. Discouraged and hurting sisters.  Maybe the waves of their crisis are raging high and the winds are gale force. Maybe it’s the heartbreaking grief of loss.  Perhaps it’s a coldness that has slipped in unaware, and the scriptures seem dry–the Lord’s voice inaudible. Maybe it’s a deep gaping wound of betrayal and hurt.  It could be burnout from serving others and feeling unappreciated.  Maybe it’s the loneliness, the waiting…feeling forgotten.

So He went to her, took her hand and helped her up.

My heart responded. THIS. This is what we need more of. This is the Jesus-way. 

He went…

How often do we see someone whose smile doesn’t quite make it to their eyes? Do we hear the tiredness and discouragement in their words? How often do we notice their absence? Are we looking? Are we aware? Are we willing to go and ask just one more question, gently pushing at the emotional barrier in place? Are we willing to go and work on relationships, building trust and space for conversations to happen? Are we willing to go beyond our comfort zone in order to connect? Are we willing to go and show kindness, compassion and friendship when there’s not a lot in return?

He took her by the hand…

Some time ago, I read of a woman who had spiraled into a dark hole of depression. (here: She Reads Truth) She finally admitted to trusted friends that she couldn’t pick up her bible and read it. What did her friends do? Did they act shocked and scold her? Did they launch into the list of reminders of what the Bible is and how it could help her? Did they smile sympathetically and say, “You’ll get there. Don’t worry.” before moving on in the conversation?

No, they simply opened their own bibles and began to read to her, taking turns reading truth and hope and love…pouring light into her darkness, into her pain…breathing life into that almost snuffed-out flame.  What a picture of taking a sister by the hand! Coming alongside and offering her their strength when she had none of her own.

Hand-holding

“Hand-holding” will look different in every circumstance. It could be the check-in texts to let someone know you’re thinking of them; a quiet walk around the pond sipping coffee; inviting someone into your own chaos of daily life to give them a change of scenery – no pressure to talk; dropping off a meal to take one little thing off their mind for the day; listening without advice and suggestions; going for ice-cream and offering to pray briefly with them. The list is as varied as the personalities God has created.

He helped her up…

He could have healed her with a word from the hallway (or anywhere!) and commanded her to get up and get going. But He didn’t. He heard she was in bed sick and went to her. Can’t you see Him gently taking her hand and helping her up with a smile? She was still weak with the fever and would have relied on His strength. His help. Only after He drew close with His strength did she recover from the fever.

In order for Him to help her to her feet, He still needed to hold her hand. I tried to think about how helping her up would have looked different from taking her hand. Her body weight would have given resistance, and it would have taken effort on His part. He would have had to lean in closer and likely secured her with a second hand. Jesus didn’t offer her a listening ear only to leave the room, or a comforting pat on the hand before going on with His business.

I have no doubt He ensured she was steady before letting go.

Some of you are amazingly faithful friends. You shine in keeping connections and reaching out time and time again. You are gold. (seriously.) 

Others of us spring awake when there’s a crisis. It is more natural to go into a crisis and take a friend by the hand. We may even be involved with helping them to their feet.

But the steadying part? That takes a long-term commitment.

And many of us need to work on this.

We can’t forget our friend when the crisis passes. There are still aftershocks. The urgency may not be there any longer, but they still need to be known and remembered. The need for compassion and friendship is still there. The need for prayer is still there. The need to be included and accepted is still there.

We need each other. Our local church needs us to serve one another in love. We need to help each other to our feet and cheer each other on. We need to support one another and have each other’s back. We need to move beyond our selfish interests, petty slights and annoyances, to reach out to others and draw them up and in. We need to speak words of encouragement, gentleness, and kindness. We need to go out of our way to love well.

I love how the Message paraphrases Ephesians 4:2,3 — “…pouring yourselves out for each other in acts of love, alert at noticing differences and quick at mending fences.  You were called to travel on the same road and in the same direction, so stay together, both outwardly and inwardly.”

We need to value each other, remembering the immense value Christ has placed on each of us. Christ unifies us. Our differences should fade when we see each other through Christ and the Cross.

Let’s look for opportunities to go, take ‘her’ by the hand and help ‘her’ up. Let us be known for loving well for the long-haul.

This is the Jesus-way.